Many writers like being controversial. Being controversial gets attention and attention is always good for a writer. Personally I get tired of controversy, it's just about riling people up, and I'm not fond of being riled up. On the other hand, I do feel strongly about certain things that are close to my heart. Talking about these things immediately puts me into controversial territory. I always wanted my writing to stay far away from conflict. I wanted to write about butterflies, and making a difference in the world in a way that people, in general, could rally around. I wanted to speak to man's greater sense of good. Case in point: Mother Teresa, not controversial.
However, when I REALLY write, I get close to my heart and I end up talking about those things that might be considered controversial. AND when I get close to my heart, I find a vulnerable space there. The writing that means the most to me is the writing that exposes me.
Sometimes, after publishing a post, I feel strange. Maybe I shouldn't put myself in public like that. The phantom of the opera is walking around Paris mask-less, but when it's not personal, is doesn't touch the lives of others.
Every day, us writers have to ask ourselves: do I want to open my veins onto the page and really touch other people's lives, or do I want to stay safe and unwounded? The choice should always be to open ourselves, but that is the scary place.
Once upon a time I read an Amazon review for the book Twilight by Stephanie Meyers (maybe you've heard of it). Here are a few lines from the review:
"Bella Swan (literally, "beautiful swan," which should be a red flag to any discerning reader) moves to the rainy town of Forks, and the whining begins on page 1. She is quickly established to be a mopey, ungrateful, self-pitying little toerag. At her new school, Bella Sue is promptly adored by everyone except the mysterious Cullens, who spend their time brooding, being pretty, smoldering, being perfect, and sparkling. Bella meets Edward, the Culleniest of the Cullens, (meaning he is more perfect and emo than the rest of them,) they fall in love within thirty pages. The plot shows up somewhere in the last fifty pages, which involves an EVIIIIIILL vampire named James who wants to eat Bella. James is the only character I like."
While this review is witty, and sums up my feelings about the book, it is destructive in it's tone. When Stephanie Meyers began writing these books, she probably didn't think about angry Amazon reviewers. If she had, she may not have finished.
While I'm sure this reviewer wouldn't mind the non-existence of the Twilight books, I wonder how many artists he has blocked from creation, simply because they envision a reviewer like him, wittily and publicly, tearing their work apart. The guy who wrote this review probably has difficulty building meaningful things in his life, because he knows all about the angry, ranting critics out there. In fact, he probably tears himself down before he even begins anything. Destructive energy takes much less effort than creative energy. And anything can be destroyed.
So it is my goal to be more vulnerable, more personal, and hopefully touch the lives of you, my beautiful readers, with each post. Critics, I hope you will learn to build. I used to be a destroyer too. (Don't get me started on the girl who constantly states that she doesn't eat chocolate.) Sigh...I still have work to do.
However, when I REALLY write, I get close to my heart and I end up talking about those things that might be considered controversial. AND when I get close to my heart, I find a vulnerable space there. The writing that means the most to me is the writing that exposes me.
Sometimes, after publishing a post, I feel strange. Maybe I shouldn't put myself in public like that. The phantom of the opera is walking around Paris mask-less, but when it's not personal, is doesn't touch the lives of others.
Every day, us writers have to ask ourselves: do I want to open my veins onto the page and really touch other people's lives, or do I want to stay safe and unwounded? The choice should always be to open ourselves, but that is the scary place.
Once upon a time I read an Amazon review for the book Twilight by Stephanie Meyers (maybe you've heard of it). Here are a few lines from the review:
"Bella Swan (literally, "beautiful swan," which should be a red flag to any discerning reader) moves to the rainy town of Forks, and the whining begins on page 1. She is quickly established to be a mopey, ungrateful, self-pitying little toerag. At her new school, Bella Sue is promptly adored by everyone except the mysterious Cullens, who spend their time brooding, being pretty, smoldering, being perfect, and sparkling. Bella meets Edward, the Culleniest of the Cullens, (meaning he is more perfect and emo than the rest of them,) they fall in love within thirty pages. The plot shows up somewhere in the last fifty pages, which involves an EVIIIIIILL vampire named James who wants to eat Bella. James is the only character I like."
While this review is witty, and sums up my feelings about the book, it is destructive in it's tone. When Stephanie Meyers began writing these books, she probably didn't think about angry Amazon reviewers. If she had, she may not have finished.
While I'm sure this reviewer wouldn't mind the non-existence of the Twilight books, I wonder how many artists he has blocked from creation, simply because they envision a reviewer like him, wittily and publicly, tearing their work apart. The guy who wrote this review probably has difficulty building meaningful things in his life, because he knows all about the angry, ranting critics out there. In fact, he probably tears himself down before he even begins anything. Destructive energy takes much less effort than creative energy. And anything can be destroyed.
So it is my goal to be more vulnerable, more personal, and hopefully touch the lives of you, my beautiful readers, with each post. Critics, I hope you will learn to build. I used to be a destroyer too. (Don't get me started on the girl who constantly states that she doesn't eat chocolate.) Sigh...I still have work to do.